#30: The Struggle is Real

Some people have sudoku; others have crossword puzzles. I have morning selfies.

For Krysta, morning selfies were about more than vanity. For her, a professional web model, they were an essential daily exercise. Each morning she spent fifteen minutes assessing her body and, by extension, her brand. She had to be creative with poses, props, clothing, and makeup to provide her fans with new material.

This morning she had more trouble than in the past attempting to squeeze into a 32H demi cup bra she kept around for when she wanted the "cleavage explosion" look. She had been professionally sized the previous year (it was one of her highest-viewed videos). The increased constriction around her back and spillage around the cups had the garment close to exploding off of her frame. She had likely exceeded "K-cup" several months ago.

Beyond outgrowing expensive bras, Krysta felt her strategic efforts to make her already exceptionally large breasts appear even larger were resulting in diminishing returns. While fans drooled over her incrementing numbers, relentless expansion was impractical for her body. Fortunately, she had already begun to notice positive results from her regular workouts with Alicia and adjustments to her diet. Her breasts had not gotten any smaller, but her body was better able to handle them.

Still lacking inspiration, Krysta recalled advice from her old college roommate. Sydney, a dancer and webcam model, had taken acting classes to improve awareness and control of her body. Her favorite exercise was assigning an action verb to blocks of the script. Body language always expressed intention, and the goal was to go beyond awareness, and truly take control of that intention.

I know this old bra is too small, and my breasts are too big. Plenty of people have seen my breasts before, and they keep coming back. They keep liking, and faving, and subscribing. Perhaps it is just big boobs on a small Asian chick. Perhaps it is the knowledge that they are still growing, regardless of how frustrating that is for me. If only I knew what exactly "it" was, I would understand the true power of my body...

"Struggle," Krysta said aloud. She dropped her eyes down until they met a line of cleavage that plunged down her sternum and into the ocean of flesh that was her bosom packed into an undersized bra. Her gaze swooped and dove across her curves until she had taken in their unwieldy entirety. She closed her eyes and repeated the word aloud. Following her immediate impulse, she opened her eyes, snapped a picture and studied the result.

That'll work.

Pleased enough, she went with a markedly less over-thought caption.

When you have a look in mind, but your body will not cooperate. #morningselfie #thestruggleisreal #boobs

Maybe her followers would go for it or maybe they would not. Most importantly, she had discovered something new, and that was well worth fifteen minutes.